Ranjish Hi Sahi

Notion - Ranjish Hi Sahi

'The apt representation of what this song elicits would have in fact been a blank page - or probably a line that started with spaces and trailed with periods. For I really know no words that can articulate what this song does to me.

But I shall attempt. Only because today has been a day of having faith and believing in my instinctive impulses (there’s a blog coming up about it separately too!). And this impulse deserved all my time and effort and heart and ...

The song’s playing in the background, and even if I pause it, it will resonate in me. With that happening, it becomes extremely difficult to do anything else. So do excuse the abrupt sentences.'

These were thoughts noted down in February 2018. And I never hit 'Publish' then. And it's September 2018 now. 

I have come back to this piece of mine many times in the past few months. But I have always hidden it away, even from myself. 

Ever felt the need to, actively, not speak about something simply because it overwhelms you too much? Let me give a literary example. Dominique Francon from Fountainhead? Well okay maybe too extreme. No, like her, I don't feel the need to show hatred toward something that I love - rather destroy that thing before the unworthy malign it, as Dominique would prefer. But I would rather not utter a single syllable about what truly moves me. 

And I still remember the wittiest and most hilarious response given by a close friend of mine to that honest confession. When I shared this thought with her, she said, "So basically if you don't talk about something or mention it, I am to assume you love it wholeheartedly. You never talk about ceramic. That's your true love then, right?"

Yes, I see the silliness in all of this and had laughed wholeheartedly then too at my friend's wit. But it's taken me years to understand that logic and rationality are of no consequence whatsoever in matters of - oh well, let me just use the H-word - heart.

So here goes. An open admittance!

The most glorious portrayals of romance always end up referring to and revering the pain caused by love. The separation. The heartbreak. The incompleteness. The unrequitedness. Then be it in literature or mythology or music or theatre - all art forms agree on this somehow. And perhaps that is a contributing factor to the popularity of the song Ranjish Hi Sahi.  In fact, the very first word of this song too talks of anguish, and the song then continues to roll that supposedly sweet pain through melodious notes. Now poetry is not my forte so let me not comment any more about the words of this song. But the song has a hold on me that I have struggled to express in words. And I seldom struggle with words (that's something you would know if I have ever emailed or even just messaged you). The song’s hold on me is not because of its words or because of the anguish in it. It is because it is Yaman.

Yaman or Yaman Kalyan or any compositions loosely based on these actually bring me and my life to an instant halt. Everything takes a brief pause when the notes of Yaman commence and an overwhelming rush of emotions flows through me. Goosebumps appear before I can even attempt to exercise some control. My mind, before I can do anything, already yields any and every control to the notes of Yaman. 

Bizarre? On the contrary, I consider this as being blessed. To be moved to this extent by music, in my opinion, is an extremely fortunate phenomenon. And Yaman has been doing it in all its forms over all these very many years. Be it a classical bandish, a tarana, any song, an accidentally Yaman-like tune. Be it Aaj Jaane Ki Zid Naa Karo, or a devotional song or even a dance number (hint, Rishi Kapoor dancing in a multicolour jacket on stage) - it's inescapable. Granted, that Yaman in its purest classical form cannot be even compared to all the other gimmicks performed alluding to it. But in my extremely biased opinion, all these extractions of Yaman are what they are only because they carry an iota of it in them. 

This song, though, is truly special.

Ranjish Hi Sahi is synonymous with Mehdi Hassan, there’s no doubt about that. But this jotting down and obsession of mine refers to the marvellous rendition of this song by Ali Sethi in Coke Studio. Now Dominique Francon seeped into my thoughts and got under my skin at a very impressionable age. And that, perhaps, made me a purist to a large extent. So never have been an admirer of remakes or remixes. But this song .... well let's not attempt the impossible. I can truly never explain.

In my deluded attempts of ‘singing’ any of my favourite songs, I always start from the antara. That's just something that I have always preferred and liked doing. The partial mystery and abruptness of such a performance are quite interesting. Hooks one on before they know it. And hence, I forget my disdain for remakes, keep the purist in me aside as Ali Sethi sets off with this lovely Yaman. 

Loss of semblance and awareness then follows. I am told typically one is supposed to feel this degree of emotion toward a human and not an abstract entity. That this falls under delusional behaviour and craziness. 

And you would be right too, to call me nuts. But there's another literary influence that might help you understand why I do not curb this craziness (your word, not mine) of mine. Besides Dominique Francon, Alice In Wonderland's Mad-Hatter has always had an influence on me too! And as he would brilliantly put it, 

"You are trying to understand madness with logic. 

This is not unlike searching for darkness with a torch!"